Girl, You So Well Spoken!

Grace Jones is an icon of our time. She is the quintessential INDIVIDUAL. she is not factory-created. she is not the product of a high profile relationship. her relevance was (and still is) based upon her own talent and not upon a personal relationship with a well-connected rap diva. you couldn't tell Grace Jones anything, and you still cannot. THAT is why THIS SH!T RIGHT HERE... this sh!t right here made my eyeballs bleed. 

i can deal with the ford modeling contract and the various magazine editorial spreads. i can deal with the fame and the fortune, all earned simply from being kanye west's arm candy. but when you drag grace into this, it gets personal. i let it slide before, but this time... 

this is some ol' BULLSH!T, kanye. and while i love you to death and  think amber rose is gorgeous, she is no Grace Jones. period. 

MAYBE my cuntiness arises because i happen to be of the opinion that the only person who should be recreating Grace Jones poses is ME... but i'm completely ok with that. #shade.

[image via kanye's new blog]

 

It's been a while so let me refresh your memory. This post, and others titled identically, is dedicated to items of f*ckery around the world and web-o-sphere that are ridiculous, ludicrous, and should not exist. This is not just my opinion either folks, you know you are thinking the same thing. Observe: 

• A clump of Elvis Presley's hair, chopped off in 1958, is available for sale by auction, with an estimated sale price of between $8,000 and $12,000. They even brought in a Celebrity Hair Expert, to confirm that the strands do indeed appear to belong to "The King". ::blank stare:: I am going to gently place this gross and ridiculous piece of news in the "sh!t white people do" box. I mean, I understand being a fan of someone, but seriously?? Hair?? I pity the poor child who's parents plan on putting up a semester's worth of their tuition in favour of a dead man's hair. 
• Pamela Anderson's dress. Do I even need to speak on this?
  
  
• Dear Rihanna, I do not cosign this hairdo. It takes me to a dark place. Sigourney Weaver is there and there's lots of steam.  
  
  
•  Wale, Kid Cudi, and Drake are being crowned as GQ's "Man of the Year", proving that the key to a successful career is having the right hype-machine behind you. Did a piece of your soul just die? I'm unsure as to when these three became sartorial stand-outs. Or in what world their accomplishments even begin to match up to past "Man of the Year" winners. But who the hell am I, right?

 

because this sh!t right here... this sh!t right here just ain't right.

No, but really. Some people just don't know their limits. I mean, for the love of all things good and sacred in this world! That woman, the one on the right who can't seem to even smile with her mouth closed without looking like... that... that is Lil' Kim. Your favourite female rap icon of the late 90s early 00s. Unrecognizable. smh... (Straight Outta NYC)

And in other news:

In Austin, the police do not give a d@mn how old you are, they will tase that @ss in a moment! Just ask Officer Christopher Beize who busted out his taser gun to subdue 72-year old tomcat, Kathryn Winkfein. Police brutality?? I understand that she was getting a little too rowdy, but I mean, d@mn... Clearly Granny Kat caught Officer Beize on a day when his mother-in-law had emasculated him one time too many, and he wasn't takin' no sh!t!

Just kidding! This pic is just one of many from last night's Island Def Jam Spring Showcase. But you know that's how these corny media rumors start! Next thing you know you'll hear that Rih-Rih and Redman left together and were seen entering some obscure hotel. But anyhoo... While her talent is dubious, and her propaganda whoring might be up for debate, one thing that is unquestionable is that the girl can sell an album: Rihanna, has sold 12 million albums. Kudos to her! Next, she'll be starring in the sequel to What's Love Got To Do With It, playing herself, because no one else can master that accent and those lackluster concert performances she gives with the same finesse...

And in other news, Spencer Pratt is always on hand to provide us with a "hoe, sit down!" moment of the day. Apparently he's a rapper now. He said the following in an interview with Complex Magazine:

"I would say Diddy is the most interesting Twitter-er. I definitely will follow the hip-hop circle now that I have infiltrated the game, just so that I can be aware of my rivals and what my competitors are doing. But, I’m not really interested in anybody, that’s why I started rapping. I’m still a fan of Tupac. That’s the only rapper that I’m still like, “Oh! Tupac!” Besides Gucci, and Juiceman, I’m not really excited about anybody in the game. I just love Gucci and Juice because they just have too much swag that they don’t know what to do with themselves." (Via Perez Hilton)

But that quote of the day brings a question of the day to mind: why is Complex Magazine interviewing this idiot?! F*ckery at it's finest. SMH...

(pics courtesy of Concrete Loop)

Dominos Pasta DUDE!

With the rebranding of Domino's Pasta dishes, the folks over at Gawker thought it was an opportune time to remind everyone of "Pasta Dude", the rappin pasta commercial that Domino's released back in the fall of '08, then had to pull because it was argued that Pasta Dude appears to be "either smackin’ it up, flippin’ it and rubbin’ it down…or something else far more vulgar"... Personally, my favourite part of the video is when the little boy says, "this is tight!"... LMAO!!! Who wrote this nonsense?!

via Gawker via So Good Blog